Moving Tales, Adventures in Relocation/By Linda Kozar

The idea for this book came to me eight years ago.

Three separate publishing houses took the proposal to committee. But I was a newbie, an author wannabe--with no name, no platform, no nothing. It's hard to get a nonfiction contract without any of that. So I turned my attention to fiction and started getting contracts. I wrote more fiction.

For a while, the nonfiction manuscript gathered electronic dust. Eight years to be exact.

But at the fall of 2012, I decided to indie-pub my little gem. And I'm glad I did.

With the rise of Ebook publishing, authors need no longer bewail the manuscripts tucked into the back of their desks or filed away in electronic limbo. We have options in this day and age, and that's a good thing, a very good thing.

Granted, not every book should be dusted off and launched into the world of words.  Let's face it, some of our first projects are not that good. But I have always believed in this little compilation book, and felt the time had come to put those stories out there.

What better gift could you give to a friend or relative who is going through a move? A Kindle book on moving! No wrapping for you. No packing for them.

~*~

If you or somebody you know is packing up for a migration across town, across the country or around the world, Moving Tales, Adventures in Relocation, offers a welcome diversion to the broken dishes, lost furniture and everything else that always seems to go wrong during a move. The lighthearted, and sometimes unbelievably true stories of those who’ve moved in, moved out and moved on, will move your heart and lift your spirits.

Signs They Are A ‘Changing

By Jeff Mitchell

Good neighbors are not always easy to come by. So when my wife and I found out our close friends were planning to move, we took some unusual steps to prevent, or at least delay that from happening.

We have a great bunch of neighbors here in Garden Grove California, We’ve spent many, many evenings on our front patio hanging out and discussing life. Swapping stories about the accursed dog down the street that’s been barking nonstop, listening to Joe's excuse for not winning last night's Dwarf Car race, tallying up a list of who’s going to hear ‘the band’ tomorrow night, etc. Usually someone doesn't show up for at least one of these sessions, which is when we take it upon ourselves to ‘mess’ with those who are not present. I usually keep a Costco-sized case of TP and plastic-wrap on hand for those occasions.

In league with my rogue neighbor friends, we either festoon the absentee’s yard with toilet paper or wrap their vehicle in plastic wrap. And the next day, we discuss and deny it all over coffee.

Within the past year or so though, there have been a lot of changes going on in the neighborhood. Too many close friends have moved away. The very ‘nature’ of the 'hood seems to be in transition. No matter the reason for the move, it’s sad to see people go.

So when another couple of close friends decided to relocate, it was the last straw. Oh sure, they were only moving a few miles away. But they were still leaving the neighborhood. Did I mention that they put on the best Cinco de Mayo parties?

Though my wife and I hoped our friends would have a change of heart and decide not to go--when the For Sale sign went up, we had to face reality. Our friends were moving, for real.

I wasn't ready to see them leave, but I wasn't going down without a fight, so I started thinking. What can I do to mess with this move?

After I pondered the situation for a while, I came up with a plan to make some interesting “additions” to the abominable “For Sale” sign outside our friend’s home. Ideas began bouncing around like ping pong balls.

I remembered that his wife had always been fascinated with the haunted house phenomenon. Hmmm. And, I reasoned, there's always a story in the news about the police department busting a meth-lab somewhere…” So I decided to add two new "features" to the For Sale sign.

With the thought that it would steer prospective buyers in the “right” direction, that is, away from the house, I got to work early Saturday morning in my garage. I cut some plywood to the regulation size, drilled some holes, and fabricated some "S" hooks. Then I printed the

appropriate words on photo paper, taped them to the plywood, and covered the signs with laminate sheets. The signs came out so good I had to step back a minute to admire my handiwork. Looked real nice.

On Sunday morning, my wife Sara and I headed down the street on our mission. The targets of our prank usually slept in on Sunday, so we were safe. We hung the signs, took the pictures, and laughed all the way home.

Of course, the signs didn't stay up long. Another neighbor brought the sign additions, “Haunted,” and “Meth Lab” to the couple’s attention later that day, and after a good-humored laugh, they took the additions down.

Guess they didn't like the "S" hooks or the color of the ink or something.

In spite of our best efforts though, our friends soon sold the house and moved on.

Funny thing--I believe our friends still have those signs tucked away somewhere. We probably haven’t seen the last of them. In fact, I suspect we’ll see those signs again in our front yard if we ever decide to move.

Buy a copy on Amazon

If you or somebody you know is packing up for a migration across town, across the country or around the world, Moving Tales, Adventures in Relocation, offers a welcome diversion to the broken dishes, lost furniture and everything else that always seems to go wrong during a move. The lighthearted, and sometimes unbelievably true stories of those who’ve moved in, moved out and moved on, will move your heart and lift your spirits.

Linda Kozar is the co-author of Babes With A Beatitude—Devotions For Smart, Savvy Women of Faith (Hardcover/Ebook, Howard/Simon & Schuster 2009) and author of Misfortune Cookies (Print, Barbour Publishing 2008), Misfortune Cookies, A Tisket, A Casket, and Dead As A Doornail, (“When The Fat Ladies Sing Series,” eBooks, Spyglass Lane Mysteries, 2012). Her latest novel Strands of Fate released October 2012 (Hardcover/Ebook, Creative Woman Mysteries). She received the ACFW Mentor of the Year Award in 2007, founded and served as president of Writers On The Storm, The Woodlands, Texas ACFW chapter for three years. In 2003, she co-founded, co-directed and later served as Southwest Texas Director of Words For The Journey Christian Writers Guild. She and her husband Michael, married 24 years, have two lovely daughters, Katie and Lauren and a Rat Terrier princess named Patches.

Represented by: Wendy Lawton, Books & Such Literary Agency

Member of: CAN (Christian Authors Network), RWA (Romance Writers of American), WHRWA (West Houston Romance Writers of America), ACFW (American Christian Fiction Writers), Writers On The Storm, The Woodlands, Texas Chapter of ACFW, Toastmasters (Area 56) The Woodlands, Texas, The Woodlands Church, The Woodlands, TX.

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